Every other Friday, my critique partner and I meet to go over our respective works and brainstorm the next step in our stories. We had to reschedule this week due to my cold, so I thought I'd share a little piece of the current work in progress:
Mother rose and looked down on me. Her ar’nel temporarily blinded my vision as she probed my mind for a lie. Without the drugs, I could have shielded my thoughts and memories from her, but whatever Sun had slipped into my food left me rotten and naked before her magic. She saw my inhibitions laid bare.
She finally announced, “We believe you, Makar.”
Before she could withdraw from my mind, my ar’nel rose up and vomited my animosity in her face. My darkness burned holes in the mists of her magic.
I struggled up through the narcotics and enunciated each word. “I. Hate. You.”
She turned her face from my rage. “Take care, Makar.”
“Father loved you, and you ran him away too,” I said with tears in my eyes. “You made him hate us.”
Her open palm struck my cheek so hard I felt the sting of her blow in spite of the narcotics. I pursed my lips and tried to spit at her but my mouth was too dry.
She flinched anyway. I’d taken her by surprise. She expected my tears, my sorrow, but she had not anticipated my rage.
When she looked at me again, her glare had turned diamond sharp.
We became enemies that night.
I'll be back on Monday. I've got a contest coming up soon, so stay tuned for that. 2014 is going to rock. You just watch.